Friday, December 01, 2006

The week from hell has ended.

When does your week "begin"? For those of us who do the 8am to 4p--or whatever--the week begins on Saturday. No, actually Friday afternoon. My Friday afternoon was a resolution of much time spent wondering why November was such a difficult month. The US elections were uninteresting and more of the same to me. Boring. Scary.

My days spent at work were often extremely taxing. I stopped bringing my guitar to work to play for the kids. That's part of the problem. Not staying in touch with my inner rhythms. I NEED to play music and sing and dance. Children with autism also need to move and dance and hear music. Also, I took a week off at Thanksgiving and when I got back on Monday all these social workers had come by and undending social problems were thrust in my face.

Creatively, not much got done this month. I have been so apathetic. I started out painting and ended up doing nothing. The toilet still doesn't flush correctly. Shopping for clothes was uneventful and dull. I only saw Amma once. (I can say seeing Amma was the best moment of the month besides the video I took of my friend and my ex-lover shouting about the minimum wage in the U.S. I shot an hour's worth. (So dedicated, right?) I want to edit it down to 10 minutes or less. My friend couldn't get a word in. People don't like to watch others' frustrations for too long!

Frustration? Try dealing with a karmic debt you don't know how to pay. Your heart is pounding. You can't breathe. The stars are all tugging at your hair. Your hands move but not your voice. This all happened today. I put my forehead on the rug in the meditation room at Love of Ganesha. My face fell into the garlands in the singing bowl. Ganesh always hears me.

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