I saw Amma yesterday.

I took Monday and Tuesday off from work this week. Wednesday, Thursday and Friday are already holidays. So, I didn't go into work at all this week. I'm writing like this week is over!!! It started on Friday night when I felt really weird and tired but took a video of two friends arguing about the mininum wage. I woke up Saturday morning with a wicked flu. Stayed in bed until Sunday when I worked at a store in the Haight. Monday I cleaned the house and my clothes while I was still sick.

Yesterday morning I drove to San Ramon to see Amma. Every time I see I come back glowing with what must be love. She is the embodiment of love and compassion. There is something very nice about getting a hug from Amma. She has what must be divine love radiating from her pores. Although there were tons of new people there, the vibe was completely chill. No stress. I didn't do any seva, though.

I want to see her in a public program on Friday. The retreat that people are on up there didn't appeal to me because I did it once at this time of year three years ago. If you don't have a boyfriend or friend to stay with, someone of my means has to room with someone unknown. Hotels in general don't appeal to me, but the one I stayed in (for one night!) was right next to the freeway. What a getaway!!!

Negativity and the pull there aside, I am so happy to be able to see Amma at all this year. I've been sick. I don't want to pass it to her or anyone. By Friday I'll be strong enough to drive there and deal with the crowds!

Election Confection Smechtion

Have you every had candy that made you puke? Licorice is one that does it to me. The election coverage by CNN and CO. was so strange and uninteresting that it was not really eye candy (which tv mainly covers) but puke without the awful candy. I voted so completely other than most. I got so disgusted with the ballot that I sent 1 sheet in with no voting on it. As far as the legal people, judges and whatever, I voted "No" on all of them!

The good news was that Berkeley residents overwhelmingly voted to impeach Bush. It is a little known fact that many highly educated people live in Berkeley. There ware people who just understand that it's their right to vote as they feel.

Oh, the blood.

Just got back from seeing THE DEPARTED. WHY so many guns? Why Jack Nicholson as one of the gangsters in Boston who
made no effort to concoct a Bostonian accent! The only things that made this film not just another CSI:Wherever were the dissolves and jump cutting. At one point I had to go to the bathroom, and all I could think of was, "This film is not WILD STRAWBERRIES." But in its editing techniques and rhythm the two had something in common. In Scorcese's film there a lots of shoty adagios (almost like sound bytes sometimes) within the greater work, while in Bergman's film threre are just adagios that overlap.

So many films came to mind when I watched THE DEPARTED: RESERVOIR DOGS, KILL BILL, THE 400 Blows...

"Craziness" or "brattiness.

Tonight I should be videotaping at party that is newsworthy. The cable channel 29 is looking for news for it's upcoming show
November 17th. I got upset by the host of the Bro Jud on Love Energy show. When I told him I was tired from the week, he said "Stop making excuses...your'e a flake." I won't go into details, but he expect me to make copies of his show on my dvd burner from Apple. There was a huge problem with the mini-mac I bought initially last year. Now that they've put in a new harddrive,
I have to know how to transfer data from one harddrive to another. It's a long (and boring) story.

So, instead videotaping an event tonight, I am seeing Scorcese's newest film. It's just not my thing--the whole "gangster" thing. But a friend of mine who has never been verbally abusive to me wants to see it. I'll go. I want to talk to my film history teacher about the Scorsese film. I got an Q--no, an A on the last exam. Soviet, German and French cinema. I wrote about
the French film, though I loved Eisentein (we didn't see much of him). He was a painter on the film screen.

Saved it up for this Dance.

I'm in love with my cat but won't admit it. There, I said it. Unconditional love is so alluring. Now he has lost tons of weight and
had x-rays taken at the vet today. They think it's his kidneys. They want to do ultrasound testing. I don't think the vet is right.
But, then, what do I know? If I buy him some food he really likes and he starts to throw up everywhere, it will be a test.

Well. it's only our lives. He has been a punk, too. That's kind of what I like about him. But, utimately he's very sweet. He's all black (with white hairs in his ears) with green eyes. He is lovely. He's sweet. He's always gone outside and has never lost a
cat fight. He's nine and a half years old.

Right now I'm very concerned about him. It's hard for me to see him so boney. Maybe he will live longer than anyone thought. I believe it's totally up to him. He might be ready to leave. He may want to stay. Of course, I want him to stay. But I want him
to eat!!! He has to eat at least at the same ratio that I consume fattening foods. I feel pudgey today.


From Hairs

Celestial, gleaming, starry night
With fingers crawling up and down,
A tabla is seen but not heard,
All dressed in green, the suggestion
Of indentation is still present.
Another source. Be together.

Too tired to blog?

I think that I need some rest. But it seems that everything needs my attention--RIGHT NOW. For example, one of the cats left feces stains in about 4 places near my bathroom. At work, I did some social work...after hours. At noon when I went to a cafe with one of my friends, I could have fallen asleep right there. I got a large chai and kept going! I hope that the month of November will be balanced and healthy. I tried making dahl tonight (another task--but it was good).

There's a book I haven't started for my Latin American Art class. The film text goes unread, too. I wonder what film we're going to watch tomorrow night. It happens to be GOLD DIGGERS OF 1933...OK, that's enough.

Time to lie down or do some yoga.