BAMBI

This will be my second time trying to get through this film. I has made me wonder why some women want to be called Bambi. I was acquainted with one once. The music is really getting on my nerves. What is it about this time period (the fifties in Hollywood) that's so annoying?

I borrowed this film from a spiritual friend. I suppose I'm waiting to see what uplifting message I'm going to get from this.

Once, again, I missed San Francisco's version of Berlin's Love Parade. What was my problem? I don't like that it's in CIvic Center. Everything I've gone to there (besides political rallies) has been weird for me. About five years ago I played guitar outside at the Medical Marijuana celebration in the flea market section of Civic Center. What's the difference?

I'm just making up excuses. It was four hours of dance that did it to me. But last night I saw some extremely practiced dancers at Fort Mason. The ensemble is a collaboration between Chitresh Das (Kathak pandit) and Jason Samuels Smith, a really talented tap dancer at the beginning of his career. To dance tap with Kathak speed and rhythm is really marvelous. I gained a great respect for tap dancers.

It was cool, though. I got to speak with Chitresh Das after the question and answer period after the show. I asked him how it is for him to dance Kali, to tell stories of Kali with dance. She is an enigmatic goddess for sure. He answered that he is from the city of Kali, Kolkatta. Someone just mentioned to me that his friends are in Kolkatta now.

Anyway, the question is: do men also has a Kali nature? I believe they do.

Housing and html

It's been a while since I've looked at the craigslist housing stuff for San Francisco. Somehow I knew I would be shocked, and I was. Places in certain neighborhoods of the city have gone up at least $500 for the same thing back in the summer. It's too scary. Somehow I don't know if I want to go through the being-the-new-roommate thing. But I would have to be anyway, since this house is so different and the way it's set up I can't hear anyone upstairs. My housemates I've been looking for places with I hardly hear at all and they me. What if we all lived on one floor? That would be a new living situation to consider. But I do know these guys. It's soo hard!!

Today I spent all day reading the html book. It's not really hard, but it will take practice. I don't intend--nor can I--learn the intricacies of this with the amount of time we have. We spent alot of time on Photoshop--our self portraits. This program does not require that much time to get some basic stuff out. Some people do know html already. They didn't even come to class! That's how the Photoshop should have been. But I'm having fun with the project, even though visually I'm keep things very simple!

Thank God for FAMILY GUY

Adam West plays the principal of Quahog High. His is the funniest character of the show. He was on recently as the mediator in the dispute over Petoria, the country Peter had established within Quahog. This reminded me of the Peter Sellers' film THE MOUSE THAT ROARED about a country which wants to be taken over--and taken care of--by the U.S. It's not a direct connection, but both FAMILY GUY and Peter Sellers' films are high on my list of comedic products of genius.

Today was considered--according to the calendar--as the first day of Fall. I wish my friend had called earlier about celebrating the equinox with candles and meditation tonight. It's cool. I have homework for a class tonight to do and I had a good time while out to dinner and walking around in the lower Haight tonight. I hadn't hung out there for a long time. It was actually not windy! I used to live in this neighborhood, and not a lot has changed, really. There's a cheaper Indian/Pakistani food place there now besides Indian Oven.

Cafe International was happening today with live jazz and blues fusion. Life store had all the lovely scents they've been making for a long time... I bought "Violet." Maybe it reminds me of the time I spent early September up north near Klamath about 9 years ago. I've got to get out of the city more!!! On Friday night, some people on Valencia had plants and some others a carpet of grass with plants strewn out into the street. I thought Friday was Fall equinox. Nevertheless both days are viable emblems of transition. Time speeding by. Days are shorter. When we have a heat wave in the middle of the week, it will actually feel like Fall equinox in San Francisco for me.

YOU, ME AND DUPREE

There is a tendency to admit--after the fact--that a film had something moderately interesting to think about. This week I watched MISSION IMPOSSIBLE 3 and YOU, ME AND DUPREE. The choice to watch these movies lay with friends; I didn't select them. It's weird, because I had told one of my friends that I wasn't into action, suspense and dumb dialogue films. But as soon as I got over there, MI 3 was on cable, and my friends were watching it. They had organized a "movie night" that was really just a viewing of what was on tv on their high definition, surround sound video system.

I actually saw the first MI with Tom Cruise back in the nineties. While I was watching MI 3, I kept thinking about how I had dragged my friend who had a Ph.D. from Harvard in anthropology to this droll film. She watched it, but she made no comment afterward. I just tried to pick out the actors I liked in the film (Lawrence Fishburne, Ving Rhames and the Belfast actor whose name I can't recall. In fact, he and an English actor were the only Europeans in this very American-Hollywood-patriotic marvel of a film.

The actors in YOU, ME AND DUPREE saved it for me, too. Actually, I only like Matt Dillon. Kate Hudson has shown that small breasts, thinnish lips and very small breasts can be a part of a beautiful Hollywoodish young actress. Her acting itself, though, is flat to me. Matt's was very flat. He's best as New Yorker. Playing an LA-style character is just not him. It's like he's from another country, and everyone is less self-conscious.

The peroxide-headed actor, Owen Wilson, is just not funny. He's not even cute. How did he get into films, I wonder? He's one for whom the Stanislavsky method really has paid off.

There are marriages between man and woman in both of these films. Another common occurrence in each film was the union of a man at least 12-15 years older than the woman. The difference was subtle, because Cruise, Matt Dillon and Owen Wilson are all boyish, though two are over 40. Of course, all of these actors have had their share of plastic surgery. I was looking forward to watching a thought-provoking film. But all I got were two films that stated that real love is dependent upon how good one looks.

The University of Utopia.

Bro Jud is such a trip. I hung out with him this weekend. He truly has affected many people with his ideas and collectives. Look in Wikipedia for polyamory. Jud and his commune mates came up with this term.

Jud showed me some literature that he wrote in 1979, years after the commune was founded in the Haight. The article I found most interesting concerned the 'University of Utopia." It's taken from the black/white pamphlett entitled "Utopian Eyes."

It begins:

The work of George Gurdjieff and Peter D. Ouspensky is worth following up with the creation of a vanguard school for the study of human behavior...In my opinion, one has to arrive at the tenth dimension of love before one can attain the fifth level of consciousness. This brings us back to Gurdjieff and Ouspendky. One should read their writings to get a clear picture of the first four levels of consciousness. Then one can begin to grasp the conception of the fifth level, which involves thought transference via the attainment of altruistic love..."

To be continued...

Cheval De Frise and Derron Brown

Derron Brown is a psychological illlusionist. When he was a child he fantasized about turning the head of the kid in front of him. To me, Derron Brown has a psychological profile that is quite interesting. He is by no means unintelligent. There is a hyper-conscious ferocity about this person. He does not claim to a psychic. I watched some videos of his shows this evening. I want to watch the episodes in which he takes on a psychologist and, in another, an advertising designer. Derron Brown's world is so Orwellian--yet psy-fi.

Tonight I also had to listen to some heavy guitar music. Cheval de Frise is from Paris. There is a steel-string, amplified guitarist with an eccentric drummer; there is no singer. I bought this cd when I lived in my other house in Bernal. I use to shop alot at Aquarius Records on Valencia. The cd was recommended to me by one of the people working there. I had said I wanted European metal of some kind. I wonder what they would sound like with a singer--there songs have many and complicated changes in them. They are hardcorecollagerock.

Nichts zu sagen.

It really helps to a language that no one around you knows. My Spanish is pretty bad, but I can understand when someone is talking about me. I think I know French better, but I remember two women talking in French together so fast that I didn't get much. For some reason I studied German in high school. I finished German I in one semester and German II the next one. I even took it at the university, reading Goethe's Faust and Jung.

My favorite writer in German is Rainier Maria Rilke. I remember talking to someone from an online meet and greet session about Rilke. Why did he have to be so effete?

Meanwhile, when I'm really angry, I'll not swear--but I will talk to myself in German. Sometimes I call people names--they usually revolve around what kind of animal they look like to me.

Ich bin sehr canzada esta noche.

The Adobe Ilustrator and all the fun one can have with it/him.

My course in Multimedia has led us from Photoshop CS3 to Ilustrator 2.0(or whatever--we'll see how I do on the tests!?!). Both are part of the Adobe Suite. Now, I have a problem with this series. The layer images should be visible for easy access. My instructor didn't know how to get the layer image bigger. It is not even the size of my smallest piece of toenail.

Meanwhile, I was working on a very complex design, not really paying attention to my layers and paths and what was on top of what, but finally, my image I really wanted the machine would not save, noting that the file was corrupted. What could that mean, I thought??? Perhaps I should not have even attempted all the stuff I was trying to do. I took bitmap images and put them in this vector-based program. I spent 20 minutes working on the colors in a photograph of a painting of Ganesh.

My teacher did not know the name of Ganesh. He's really into sci-fi and whatever. But then, maybe he has a point: Ganesh could be called Vishnu or to have Vishnu-like qualities, couldn't he?

Tomorrow I have to get up early for work. The music teacher erased my scheduled supervision system for tomorrow off my white board when I was out of the class. That means I'll have to get up earlier...or not!

Celebrity SKin + APOCALYPTO

There was a band in San Francisco, kind of a metal/glam band, called Celebrity Skin. I met some of them in the late eighties when they were around. In any case, I bought a three cds for $1.50 at the Senior Center thrift store. I got Blur, House of Pain, and Hole. The Hole cd is entitled Celebrity Skin. It is all full of words about Los Angeles, the place of celebrity skin, plastic surgery and generalized superficiality.

I'll bring them to work tomorrow. Lately my day has gone by better when I listen to new cds, especially ones to be played loud. The past two weeks I was listening to Morrissey. Now it'll be House of Pain!

Meanwhile, I watched most of the (painful) scenes from APOCALYPTO. This film was a complete disaster. A very complex civilization is made out to be the Egyptians or present-day America...full of slavery, lack of justice, and overdone violence. Please do not watch this film. It is an abomination. It's worse than LASSIE. People who understood the mechanism of time couldn't be sentimentalized, thoughtless dogs--as they are portrayed in this film.